This post is from Moms Take Ten episode 99 which you can listen to wherever you listen to podcasts or at https://sites.libsyn.com/403493/love-day-from-the-mouths-of-littles
Note: The podcast episode includes interviews with several children which are not transcribed here. I definitely recommend you listen to the episode! My commentary is below.
The question, “what is love?” is not an easy one to answer, for kids or adults. Books have been written, songs have been sung, lists have been made, quotes, memes, reels, poetry, all created in an attempt to define this word. To quote the Moulin Rouge song, “Love is a many splendored things.” Love is this tangible yet intangible thing, a feeling yes, but more than that. DCTalk once sang, “Luv is a verb.” The answers from our kids when we ask “what is love?” attest to that. They talked about feelings like happiness and also actions like being cared for, physical affection, and wanting to share and play with another. They hit on this idea that it was more than what we feel, it is also how we act. And it is more than how we act but also how we make them feel. It is this blending of the two.
And isn’t that what 1 Corinthians 13 highlights. The chapter begins with doing these seemingly great things with the wrong impact because of a lack of love. It then provides a description of love that goes far beyond emotion to intentional thoughts and interactions towards another. Being patient. Being kind. Enduring through it all.
As I listened to the recordings that you all sent in, and to what my own children shared, I kept thinking how simple they made it sound. Our children are open and ready to be loved. For them it isn’t hard or complicated, they just want to feel it and receive it. And they are ready to give it right back to us. They are immensely vulnerable with us. As they get older, it doesn’t look quite as obvious, but they are still looking at us asking, “do you love me?”
A few weeks ago, my son joined my husband in the kitchen and he made dinner for him and the other kids. Now, this is not something that we practice. I wish I was better at including them in meal planning and prep. I’ve had my moments, but for the most part the kitchen is my domain. But he was there choosing ingredients, cutting veggies, mixing and seasoning. Canned coconut milk, a lot of salt, a smidge of pepper, baby carrots halved, and cherry tomatoes also halved.
I was on the couch, recovering from surgery, when he entered the room with the bowl in his hand, a proud but also timid smile on his face. The moment struck me. He might have been holding a bowl of soup, but really he was holding his heart. Do you think well of me? Are you proud of me? Do you see what I have accomplished? Will you celebrate with me? Do you love me?
And I thought about how many moments like that happen all throughout the day. In the stories they share, in the pictures and projects they show, in the actions they take, in the words they say, in the times they snuggle up and the times they push away. A million opportunities to affirm our love for them and the unconditionality of it.
That same little boy was the one you heard saying that he knows I love him when I smile at him. After we recorded that, I pulled him into my lap and talked to him about that. I ended with, “Nothing you do can make me love you more and nothing you do can make me love you less.” “I know that mama!” he said, gruffly but also happily. “Good!” I said and we moved on with our day.
Aren’t we just like him with God? We look at him and wonder, “Do you really love me? Do you see what I am doing? Are you proud of me? Will you celebrate with me? Can I lose your love?”
Here too the simplicity of our children’s answers speak to me: I know he loves me because the Bible says it. Because he sent his holy spirit to us. Because he made us.
From cover to cover, the Bible is God’s love on display through his interactions with humanity, beginning with creating us and ending with reconciling us to himself for all of eternity. This is where love begins. With the God who is love. We have the capacity to, the ability, and we do love because God first loved us, as 1 John 4:19 reminds us. So, before you get out of the car or walk out of the bedroom, or move from wherever you are listening to this podcast, sit a moment in the awe and wonder of God’s love. Allow yourself to feel it, to believe it, to be reminded of it, to be thankful for it. Drink of it deeply. Rest it in sweetly. Receive it in abundance so that the overflow washes over your children, your husband, your family and friends, and all you come in contact with.
Borrowing from Paul’s words to the Ephesians, let me pray for you.
Dear Lord, I pray that from your glorious, unlimited resources you will empower each mama listening with inner strength through your Spirit. That you, Christ, would make your home in our hearts as we trust in him. That our roots will grow down into your love and keep us strong. And may we have the power to understand, as all your people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep your love is. May we experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then we will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from you. Now all glory to you, Lord, who is able, through your mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. Glory to you in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.
Lyssa Stoyko 